


Octavian and Rachel sittin' in a tree, P-R-O-P-H-E-S-Y-I-N-G

by HufflepuffChildOfApollo



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Bad Writing, Commentary throughout, Enemies to Friends, F/M, Gen, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I was 11 when i wrote this btw, My First Fanfic, My First Work in This Fandom, Unintentionally awful fic, What Was I Thinking?, Why Did I Write This?, i don't really know how to explain this., i'm good at titles though!, sorry you had to read this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-07
Updated: 2019-09-07
Packaged: 2020-10-11 16:22:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20549114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HufflepuffChildOfApollo/pseuds/HufflepuffChildOfApollo
Summary: This is a story I wrote when I was 11 and had much more time on my hands than I do now, apparently. I found it when I was looking through my writing binder. it is a Rachtavian (Rachel/Octavian) fic. I guess it'd be a oneshot. I was a big Rachtavian shipper. (Ahhh, the days when I crushed on every guy in every book...) anyway, hope you enjoy this excellent (and by that I mean awful) bit of fluff. (it's incomplete, because I had severe writer's block.) without further ado....Rachel and Octavian sittin' in a tree, P-R-O-P-H-E-S-Y-I-N-G!





	Octavian and Rachel sittin' in a tree, P-R-O-P-H-E-S-Y-I-N-G

**Author's Note:**

> A quick warning: this is transcribed exactly as 11-year-old me wrote it; same spelling, same speech tags, same lack of paragraphs. I have not edited it at all except to add some author commentary, which will be in bold letters. I may publish a version that's been "touched up" and corrected later on.  
Also: I do not ship Rachel with Octavian anymore. 11-year-old me is a dummy.

Octavian was flying through the air. Fast. The last thing he remembered was pulling the lever on the Ballista **(note: I know now that it was an onager, not a ballista)**. He thought: "_Great. Of all the ways to die, I had to die like this. Fired off my own Ballista." _All of a sudden, he felt a burning pain. Then everything went black. When he woke up, he was lying on a beach, covered in sand. He thought aloud to himself. "if this is death, it's not too bad." He sat up and looked around. There was a small fire burning nearby. He stood up quickly, and walked up he beach to the edge of the woods. He could see a path, so he started following it. He had gone about five steps when he heard a twig snap. "Who's there?" he yelled. "I warn you, I am armed!" he yelled, and reached for his Augur's knife, but it wasn't there. He must've lost it when he was flying through the air like a human cannonball. He heard another twig snap behind him, and he slowly bent down and picked up a stick that was laying on the ground at his feet. He spun around, brandishing the stick, and came face-to-face with a teenage girl with messy red hair, freckles, and sunburned skin, holding an armful of wood. She ducked the stick, but dropped the wood on Octavian's foot. "What was that for?" she exclaimed. "You could've knocked my head off!" Octavian was in almost too much pain to answer, but managed to groan out, "You snuck up on me!" "Well that's no reason to try to kill me!" by now Octavian and she were practically nose to nose. "Hang on, I remember you," Octavian said. "You're that Mortal who speaks the prophecies of the Oracle of Delphi, Rachel." "Yes I am. and you're Emperor Nero." "What? I'm not-oh! Now I remember. No, I'm Octavian-" but Rachel cut him off here. "Augur, Centurion, Legacy of Apollo, and total idiot in general," she finished. "Listen, could you tell me where I am?" he asked. "Sure. You're on the beach." She turned to walk away, but he ran after her. "Um, could you be more specific?" "Fine. The beach, next to the woods, next to the camp for Greek Demigods." "Camp? You mean I'm not dead?" he asked, his voice hopeful. "Nope, you're as alive as I am. I found you laying on the beach. you were almost dead, but I had a few Apollo campers with me, and they were able to patch you up. We didn't want to try carrying you back to camp, we were afraid you'd wake up and try to kill everyone." "Well, thank you for your consideration. now, have you seen my Augur's knife? And my teddy bear? I'm in the mood to slaughter something." "Oh, you mean this knife?" She pulled a long silver knife out of her pocket **(Ahh, the days when I was delusional enough to think a knife would fit in girls' pockets...)**. "I found it laying next to you on the beach." "Can I have it back?" "Promise you won't stab me?" she asked, a slight smile on her face. "Don't be ridiculous, I'm not going to stab you, now give it!" "Promise?" she repeated, now holding the knife above her head, out of Octavian's reach. "Don't play games with me! Give it back!" he said, more forcefully this time. "Not until you promise not to stab me!" she said, grinning broadly. "Fine! I promise not to stab you!" he said, thoroughly exasperated. "Swear on the River Styx?" "Fine! Whatever! Just give it back!" "Okay, fine." She lightly tossed him the knife, and he just caught it by the tip of the blade. "Where are you going?" he yelled after her, for she had once again turned around and started to walk away. "back to my cave" she said. Octavian tried to register these words, but could not. perhaps he had heard her wrong. However, it soon became apparent that he had not misheard. They were hiking up a hill, and as they were nearing the top, he saw an old cave at the top, the ground at the entrance littered with old swords and bones **(Well, that's cheerful)**. A shiver ran up Octavian's spine as they approached the entrance. When they got inside, Octavian expected it to be cold and damp like, well, a cave. But instead, it was warm, dry, and comfortable. Rachel gestured for him to sit down. "So, what do you want with me?" he asked. "I want to know how you got here, and what you're doing here." So Octavian related the whole story, right up until his "Death". When he was finished, Rachel just sat there with a strange expression on her face, a mixture of disbelief and amusement. "You murdered teddy bears?" she asked, grinning **(11 year old me forgetting Rachel knew this already)**. "What's so funny about that?" he demanded. "Nothing," she said. "you just don't seem like the teddy bear type." Octavian was getting angrier by the second. "So, you wanted to know how I got here and why. There you have it. Now could you please tell me a place that I could stay for the night?" he asked angrily, but Rachel was not paying attention. "What were you again, an ogre?" "An Augur, as you very well know! I have the gift of prophecy." "Oh, so you say prophecies too?" "No. I cut open stuffed toys and use their innards to read the future. Now could you please help me find somewhere to camp for the night?" "Well, how about Camp Half-Blood?" "No! I want nothing to do with the _greacus_ scum!" At this, Rachel looked offended. "_Greacus_ scum?" she exclaimed, looking angry. "Greacus. It means greek." "I know what it means, and I'll have you know, I think very highly of those _'Greacus scum'_!" "Well, then, you must have been raised by wolves, or Greeks!" "Wow. Who have you been around that made you think greeks were so bad?" Rachel asked." "Did you _not see _what happened back there?" "Um, well, yeah, but I'm pretty sure that was all you." "All right. Well, listen. I still need to find somewhere to camp before going back to Camp Jupiter. It's a long trip and I need to rest up." "Why don't you stay at Camp Half-Blood for a couple of days and then go back along with the rest of the roman campers." "Well....." He was torn. He didn't want anything to do with the _greacus _scum, especially not that traitor Percy Jackson. But a small part of him , the part that wasn't entirely evil, was thinking about what Rachel said, that the greeks weren't so bad. and Rachel was so nice....wait! He could not lose concentration! He must kill all the greeks! _"Oh, could I maybe leave that one alive?"_ part of him asked. _"No! You must stay completely focused! Kill the greeks! take over their camp! And slaughter all their stuffed toys!" _the other part screamed. "_But she seems so nice!_" the first part argued. But then Rachel said something that ended the whole argument. "Or you could always stay out in the woods, in the rain, with the monsters." she suggested. Octavian thought _"She must be joking," _but she sounded dead serious. "What did you say?" he said. "I said the only other options are to stay with us or stay out in the woods with the monsters in the rain." she said. "What rain?" Octavian said, but then five seconds later he heard thunder, and then the sounds of rain smacking on the stone top of the cave. "Very impressive. You can predict the weather." he said sarcastically. "Can you predict what-" "You're about to say?" she finished. "How did you-" "know? Everyone asks me. So, will you stay or not?" "Well, what are my options again?" "Well, you can either go to Camp Half-Blood, train, then go back to Camp Jupiter with the rest of the Roman Campers, which would most likely be the best choice. You could stay at Camp Half-Blood, which would still be pretty wise. Or you could go out in the woods by yourself and try to get back to Camp Jupiter on your own. Of course, if you tried to return to Camp Jupiter alone, you would probably die along the way, and if you did survive you would still probably be kicked out of your camp. If you went to Camp Half-Blood, the other campers would probably try to kill you and as for staying in the woods, you'll be lucky if you live for an hour after you leave the cave." she said. "So death is my only option," Said Octavian. "Unless you'd rather stay in the cave with me", said Rachel. For a moment Octavian said nothing. He was thinking too hard to talk. "NO WAY! She can't be trusted!" Half of his brain screamed. "But wait! She's an Oracle. She might could help with your predictions!" the other half screamed **(Me writing this at 11, before Trials Of Apollo: "Prophecies totally work again!"). **Ocavian's head was pounding from it all. He groaned in pain. Rachel gasped. "What's wrong?" she asked. "Just a headache." he replied. "Okay," she said, but she looked disbelieving **(Skeptical. the word is skeptical.)** "So have you decided?" she asked. "Yes. I guess I'll stay here until I can find somewhere else." "Okay. I'll inform Chiron that I'll be needing another bed." " Thank you. " he said. "So would you like something to eat?" Rachel asked. "I have apples, steak, and fresh berries." "Okay, sure." before they ate, they each scraped a portion off of their plate into the fire as an offering for the gods. "So, what was it like at Camp Jupiter? " Rachel asked. "Well, it was okay until di Angelo and Jackson showed up, " Octavian replied. At these words, Rachel looked hurt. "And what exactly was your problem with them, may I ask?" " Well, for starters, di Angelo was a child of Pluto, and they're almost always bad luck. And then when Jackson showed up, he couldn't tell us anything about his past, all we knew was that he was a son of Neptune, and they're <s>even worse than</s> (**corrected as 'almost as bad as')** children of Pluto. And then that Greek warship showed up and blew up half the camp!" he finished. "Well, from what I heard, Leo was possessed, and it was way less than half, " Rachel said matter-of-factly. "Whatever the case, it was a declaration of war!" "Mm-hmm." Rachel crossed her arms, frowning. **(at this point out appears I gave up on this forest fire of a story, as there is no more writing.) **


End file.
